Van Warner's Summer Daze
by zackman1996
Summary: You would think that after sophmore year rebels and delinquents would straighten up. Nope, not these two. Zack "Party Rock" Cann and Yakko "Van Warner" Warner have OTHER plants for Summer 2012. 1. Score a sick set of wheels and some rims. 2. Score with as many babes as possible. 3. Get pot. 4. Screw Jimmy "Jock" Mann's girlfriend behind his back. 5. Throw a toilet at the old man.
1. Chapter 1

Intro

1929 Los Angeles California

"Welcome to Burbank California Moviegoers! Here we can see the Warner Bros. Lot where there are rumors of three kids haunting the old place. Those rumors have been disproved time and time again, but they keep popping up. I say, just show the people the truth. The kids are -." The film burns out and then a voice says "Sorry ladies and gentlemen. You were not meant to see this. Mr. Plotz has ordered the execution of everyone here. Please stay still. This won't hurt at all." A mist sprays into the theater and everyone just dies. Meanwhile, someone was looking inside and called the police.

60-sumthin years later:

"HEY PLOTZ GET UP!" yells a prison guard. No response from a short man with very little hair wearing an orange jumpsuit. "HEY ASSHOLE I SAID GET UP!" He opens the cell to find the little man dead. "Hey dispatch we got a dead one. Yeah that Plotz guy…THE SHORT ONE DUMBASS! Yeah yea watevah. Bye." He hangs up the phone.

2 Hours Later:

"Hey he was 80 years old. He just died from congestive heart failure in the middle of the night." says Warden Oldson. "So you're 100% positive he didn't just kill himself?" asks the Governor of California (NOT Arnold so shut the fuck up and stop asking). *sigh*"YES YOU DOLT! HE DIED OF OLD AGE! STOP ASKING!" yells Oldson.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1

March 18th, 1996:

At Woman and Infants,

"Congratulations Mrs. Cann. You have a son." says a young female doctor. "Oh dear. What should his name be?" asks Kelly Cann, a 29-year-old Secretary for Southwestern Bank from Baton Rouge, Louisiana. "How 'bout…Zachary?" asks Paul Cann, a 30-year-old mechanic from Detroit, Michigan. "Zack….I like that name." Thus was born a legend. A high school legend that would NEVER be forgotten in the now-hallowed halls of Burbank Regional High School. Zack William Cann's life had officially begun

At UCLA Hospital 6 years later,

"Congratulations Mrs. Warner. You have a daughter." says a young male toon doctor. "Oh thank yo—AGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH." yells Patricia Warner, a 23-year-old single mother of 2 already, working as a drive-in owner. The heart monitor flat lines as a young nurse holds a little girl who looks much like her mother. Little Dot would never meet her mother. The nurse rushes out and tells her two boys, Yakko James Warner and Wakko Colton Warner, that their mother had just passed away from a heart attack. After that, she placed the three siblings under the care of the Warner Bros. Studio. Where the ghosts of three kids much like themselves and the ghost of one Mr. Plotz roamed at night. Several years passed. The Warners did "Animaniacs" as kids, did some loose work and some cameos, and finally, Yakko's first day of middle school. This is where two very UNUSUAL people, one a lonely toon, the other a legend in the Kilter County, Pennsylvania school system, meet for the first time and start a friendship. This is where it all begins


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2:

9/12/2007: 7:59 am

Yakko James Warner, now 11 years old and in 6th grade, walked in the cold rain to school. He was running late. He heard a loud engine behind him and spun around in time to see a 2008 Maybach 57 pull up next to him. The window rolled down to reveal this kid, same age as him, sitting in the back with the most popular girl in school. He asked "Hey, you goin' to the middle school?" Yakko nervously stammered, "Y-yeah. Why?"

"Well hop in."

Yakko got into the car and rode with this kid and his girlfriend to school. He told the driver, "'Kay Kevin you're set. Take some time for yourself." The driver said, "Thank you sir. Have a nice day." The car rolled off. The bell promptly rang at 8:00 on the dot and the crowd streamed in. The kid said, "See ya at lunch dude. Table 17. Be there or be square." With that, he and his girlfriend, Kate Daniels, the most popular girl in school, strolled in. Yakko sat there for about 3 seconds speechless. He had just realized who had given him a ride. The actor Zack "Party Rock" Cann had just asked him if he wanted a ride in his Maybach. He then ran inside. Lunch came all too quickly. He was nervous that the invite was a joke. That he wasn't serious. He had a rep for being a slight nerd and a fan fiction writer, usually about his old show and other work. So he got ridiculed by everyone. He walked into the lunchroom, grabbed a slice of pizza, paid the $1.00 it was, bought a bottle of water, and looked for table 17. It wasn't hard to find. It was SURROUNDED by bodyguards, the press, and personal assistants to the famous people who sat at the table. Notables had been Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Sonic, and Mario, all of them. They had sat there because they were rich and famous at 11. He said to a bodyguard, "Hello, Umm, I got an invite to sit here with Zack Cann." The bodyguard said, "Mr. Cann never-" A voice popped out of nowhere. "BOYS LET THE GUY SIT! JEESH SECURITY IS TOO TIGHT!" The bodyguard said, "Sorry Sir." He then eyed Yakko meanly. Yakko sat down in a chair and ate his pizza. Then the inevitable happened. "HEY YO WHO LET NERDENSTIEN SIT HERE?" The biggest jerk, but not the richest asshole, Jimmy "Jock" Mann, started yelling about how "HE AIN'T SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! WHO LET THIS CRACKTARD IN?" He was about to run off when Zack stood up for him. He pulled out an airsoft revolver and pelted Jimmy in the nuts 3 times. "That oughta teach ya dumbshit. Why are YOU even here? You're worth about $5 mil. I'm worth about $900 bil. It's a $6 mil minimum to sit here. You know that." The bodyguard who shot Yakko a dirty look hauled him off. Lunch passed, Yakko had opened up more, and he became friends with Zack, and got his girl to give him a quick peck on the cheek. Zack didn't even mind. He was watching and said, "That's mah boi." They both walked off to their classes. The friendship continued. He sat at table 17 everyday, showed Zack his Fan fiction works, cracked jokes, came up with witty remarks about Jimmy, came up with ideas that usually failed, one involving fireworks and a thong, which ended with Zack bailing them both out with his money and charm. Two weeks later, they both went to an insane party. It was that night that Yakko earned his official Table 17 nickname and his first million, "Van Warner" was born. He switched out the brown slacks, glasses, and Atari tee for jeans, cargo shorts, new tees, contacts, and brand new sunglasses. Switched dwelling on the "Animaniacs" and fan fiction to doing full-blown movies, B parodies, exploitation flicks, pot films, documentaries, and hanging with the A List. He quickly achieved #2, right under Zack Cann. But the REAL fun was yet to come.


End file.
